I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize