My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
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