WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Your dad touched me again.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
