ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
