Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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