so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Randomize
