Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
she smelled like a LAN party
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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