They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
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