we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
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