Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
