I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Randomize
