first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
