Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
