Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
