its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
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I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
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Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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