saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I need moral support for this bender
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
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