OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Randomize
