just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
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