i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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