Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
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