what if every blade of grass was a penis?
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
His nipple licking is glorious
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