You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
