no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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