dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
