saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I wear drunk well.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize