dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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