:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I don't want my vagina anymore.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
