My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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