she kept yelling 'call me bella'
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Randomize
