Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
