We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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