I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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