I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
