For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize
