I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
