Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
