Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
