honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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