All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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