you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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