dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
