help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
