i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
