she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
