I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Randomize
