She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
the day after is always just damage control
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize