How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize