were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
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