I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
