Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I look better un-naked...
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
