Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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