yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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